Image may be NSFW.
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Last week I asked Natasha to create a picture. (It is posted on the right.) I wanted to see her mental life. What does a life filled with nervous feelings (anxiety disorder) look like?
Feelings can be difficult to explain. Over the years I have discovered that Natasha can draw her feelings and thoughts. And once she has the picture, she can describe the feelings.
After the picture was completed, I ask Natasha to tell me the fish’s story. Here is what I was told about the “nervous feelings” picture.
The fish is surrounded by choices. And all of them make her nervous.
Clik here to view.
Clik here to view.
The fish could swim forward and find shelter. But first she has to pass by the jagged edges of the cave. Interesting that the cave has “teeth” looking edges.
The fish could swim up and find food. But she has to avoid the hook in order to eat. And if she kept swimming upward she couldn’t breath. Or she would run into the boat. (Boat is the gray line.) Notice the cutting edges of the engine propeller are drawn too.
The fish could swim backwards but there are strange falling shapes.
The fish could swim downward but there is a forest of seaweed. Who knows what is in this forest? Maybe it will tickle. Maybe it will hurt.
Making decisions in this environment are difficult and stressful. Because the fish has so many bad thoughts running around in her head, she doesn’t feel good. She makes mistakes all the time. She is in trouble all the time.
So once the fish makes a decision she doesn’t feel her anxiety decrease. She is still stressed out.
Natasha lives with anxiety about:
- sleep
- growing up and not being able to get a job
- making friends
- looking stupid
- being stupid
I think we had a break through with the “being stupid” fear. Natasha has completed IQ tests at many different times. I reminded her on Saturday that she has an average IQ. I am average. She is average. Grandma is average.
And yes she doesn’t know the names for all 50 states. (She is being tested on states on Monday.) Maybe she is right. She will only get 1 or 2 right. That is OK. She struggles with rote memorization and will her entire life. If she ever needs to know all 50 states, she can google it like all the adults.
Additional information:
Anxiety Attacks and Disorders: Symptoms, Types, and Treatment
Generalized Anxiety Disorder Symptoms
Generalized Anxiety Disorder
Psychiatric Disorders – Anxiety Disorders
Copyright
My daughter Natasha gave me permission to use the fish picture above. It is copyrighted by natasha.energy@gmail.com
